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magicallawTitle: You Have Got To Be Kidding Me
Author: Madge
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Donna
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: My Doctor Who dolls are sat on my bookshelf but that's the closest I'll get to owning anything to do with this show.
Summary: In which Donna gets the Doctor pregnant. (What?)
Author's Note: Written for the ficafest on![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
marriedonmars. The summary tells you what prompt it was for.
“You have got to be kidding me?”
“What?” the Doctor exclaimed, a bit too high pitched for his liking, if truth be told.
Donna closed her magazine, placed it on her bed next to her and gave the Doctor a somewhat disapproving look. “You, that’s what. You don’t think that actually works, do you? Standing seductively in a doorway. It’s a bit cliché, innit?” The Doctor’s seductive grin fell and turned into a small frown. “Oh,” she suddenly realised, “you tried this on with Martha, didn’t you? Sorry, go on.” She sat up properly and picked up her magazine, giving him his cue to continue.
Of course, Donna failed to keep up the pretence for too long, and peered over the top of her magazine. “Did she really fall for that silly smirk thing you do?”
“What smirk?” he protested.
“Gotta say, that girlie voice doesn’t do it for me, either.”
“Why do you think I’m trying to seduce you?”
“Because it’s what you do, isn’t it? Seduce women, I mean. Oh, don’t look at me like that; I’m not stupid, Spaceman. Actually, I’m quite flattered. Especially if you class me in the same league as Martha, ‘cos she’s... she’s ... Well, that white coat doesn’t do her any favours, but yeah...”
“Yeah, what?”
“Are you blind as well as stupid? You spent how long with this woman and you didn’t once notice how incredible her arse is?”
“No.” Technically that wasn’t a lie; he had noticed more than once. But going on about how great his previous companion was to the current one wasn’t the greatest of ideas. Well, he knew that now, anyway. “Why are you so dead against the idea of me seducing you?”
“Ha! I knew it.”
“I mean, you’re here now and everything. Seems silly not to.”
“You’re incredible, and I don't mean that in the good way.”
“I’m quite good at it, actually. Or so I’m told, anyway.”
“I’M. NOT. MATING. WITH. YOU. You got that?”
“Who said anything about mating? Casual sex, Donna,” he waggled his eyebrows at her – quite possibly his last throw of the dice. “All the cool kids are doing it.”
“I’m not a kid, Doctor.”
“Exactly! That’s the best bit. No strings attached, just sex. And we’re both mature enough to deal with it. Great, isn’t it?” The only problem was that the Doctor was now bouncing around Donna’s bedroom with a silly grin on his face that made him seem anything but mature. He noted this and hopped on to the end of Donna’s bed, posing (he hoped) rather seductively.
“This is ridiculous. You’re ridiculous.”
“I’ll let you go on top,” he murmured.
Precisely two minutes later...
Both naked now, the Doctor flipped Donna over on to her back. “Hey,” Donna stopped him, “you said I can go on top.”
“Did I?”
“Yes.” She slapped him, and not exactly playfully, either.
The Doctor’s face reddened, and not just where she slapped him. “Err, yeah... Donna, you might not want to do that again if you want me to last much longer,” he gasped.
’You’ve gotta be kidding me,’ thought Donna.
“Doctor?”
“Oh, Donna.” The Doctor ignored the questioning tone in Donna’s voice and continued with his efforts.
“No. Doctor?” she asked again.
“Oh, Donna.”
“Oi! Would you bloody well listen to me?” The seriousness of her voice was hidden by the rather loud pleasurable gasp she let out at the end of that sentence. The Doctor was right; he was rather good at this.
“What is it?” he asked, somewhat frustrated.
“The TARDIS. It’s... it’s... it’s... It’s changed colour.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Are you paying attention to anything I’m saying?”
The Doctor stopped moving for a moment and looked straight at her. “Do you seriously want me to stop?” And then, somewhat arrogantly, he thrust in to her at a quite perfect angle.
“Oh God, no.”
So he continued. Not for much longer, admittedly, but long enough for the TARDIS to complete the necessary calculations just in time for, well, in time for the inevitable.
“OK,” Donna breathed, “I’ll give you that one; you are quite good at that.”
It sounded like the Doctor replied, “Thank you”, but Donna couldn’t be sure as his voice was muffled by her breasts. She let the Doctor lie there for a little longer as he recovered. It was only fair; after all, he had two hearts to slow down instead of one.
But as she lay there, she realised that the ceiling of her bedroom had now completely changed colour. In fact, so had the rest of the walls, and the light looked different in the corridor outside as well.
“Doctor?”
He lifted his head. “Could you give me a minute? Blimey...”
“No, look. I was right, the TARDIS has changed colour.”
“But... But that’s...”
“Impossible?” Donna offered.
“No, not impossible. Just - ”
“Not good?”
“No, no,” the Doctor lied. “Just, you know, a bit odd.” He climbed off the bed and gathered up his clothes, backing slowly towards the door. “I’d better go and - ”
“Yeah.”
“Just... Don’t move, all right?” he said as he vanished through the door way, pulling his pants on in the process.
“Yeah, Doctor,” she yawned, “whatever you say.”
She was asleep within seconds.
He was half dressed by the time he reached the console room. Well, half decent, anyway.
“What have you done?” he asked his ship as he flicked the monitor on and typed in some complex equations on the console.
“Oh.” He stopped typing as the answer he sought appeared on the screen. “You - ” The lights in the console room flickered in response. “You - ” he stammered again.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“Donna, we need to have a little chat.”
“You said this wasn’t going to be weird.”
“Weird? Trust me, weird doesn’t even cover it.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Look, come here, there’s something I want to show you.”
“Don’t be so disgusting. Besides, I saw enough last night, thank you very much.”
“What? No, not that. Anyway, it’s not disgusting, is it? Of course, we’re not here to discuss the attractiveness of my genitalia,” he assured her. “Donna, there’s not really a good way for me to tell you this so I’m just going to have to say it. Donna, we’re pregnant.”
“I’m pregnant?”
“No.”
“What? But you just said - ”
“Yes, I thought it might soften the blow.”
“What blow?”
“I’m pregnant.”
“That’s...”
“Yep.”
“That’s...”
“I know.”
“That’s hilarious!” Donna blurted out. “Your ship knocked you up.” The fact that Donna was pointing and laughing wasn’t really helping matters.
“No, you knocked me up.”
“That’s what all that nonsense was with the lights and stuff, wasn’t it?”
“You were there too, I seem to remember.”
“What do you mean, ‘I seem to remember’? It should have been pretty bloody memorable for you.”
The Doctor sighed, “I think you’re missing the point.”
“So, you’re going to be a mum?”
“Dad. I’m going to be a dad.”
“Is that normal, though? For your lot, I mean; men having babies.”
“You don’t wanna know what was normal for my lot when it came to having babies.”
“What?”
“No, Donna. It’s not normal.”
“Well, what are you gonna do?”
“We, Donna. What are we gonna do,” he corrected.
“I mean, you’re not exactly in your prime, are you? I mean, you’re gonna need check ups and stuff like that.”
“Bit late for that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, according to the scan the TARDIS performed earlier, I’m due in approximately four hours.”
“But... But you’re still so...” She gestured with her hands to emphasize how small his waist was.
“It’s the pinstripes; they’re very flattering.”
“I’ll make a note of that.”
“Not really the time for fashion tips, is it? I’m having your baby, Donna Noble.”
“Fucking hell.”
“That’s another thing: I don’t want you swearing around the baby.”
“Yeah but, fucking hell.”
He couldn't help but agree with her. “Tell me about it.”
“Well, I should get you to a hospital or something, shouldn’t I? Shouldn’t I?”
“That’s the problem: I can’t think of many hospitals that would be able to deal with a pregnant Time Lord in labour. Well, there was one, but it closed down. And, no, before you ask; I had nothing to do with it.”
“Well, what then? You don’t expect me to fetch some towels and hot water and just sit it out, do you?”
“Well, there was one person I thought might be able to help us.” And with that, he chucked her the mobile phone that lived permanently on the console.
“Martha? It’s Donna here.”
“Oh, hi, Donna. Is everything all right?”
She looked over at the Doctor who was just recovering from another contraction. “Err, yeah. Everything’s fine.”
“Argh, not again,” the Doctor yelled out in the background. He was now bent over the console, trying to control his breathing as another contraction took hold of him.
“Was that the Doctor? Is he all right?”
“Actually, Martha, I’ve got some news,” Donna admitted.
“What is it?”
“I’m going to be a dad.”
“You have got to be kidding me.”
I WILL TRY AND WRITE SERIOUS!FIC WITH THESE TWO. ONE DAY. PROMISE.
Author: Madge
Characters/Pairings: Ten/Donna
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: My Doctor Who dolls are sat on my bookshelf but that's the closest I'll get to owning anything to do with this show.
Summary: In which Donna gets the Doctor pregnant. (What?)
Author's Note: Written for the ficafest on
marriedonmars. The summary tells you what prompt it was for. “You have got to be kidding me?”
“What?” the Doctor exclaimed, a bit too high pitched for his liking, if truth be told.
Donna closed her magazine, placed it on her bed next to her and gave the Doctor a somewhat disapproving look. “You, that’s what. You don’t think that actually works, do you? Standing seductively in a doorway. It’s a bit cliché, innit?” The Doctor’s seductive grin fell and turned into a small frown. “Oh,” she suddenly realised, “you tried this on with Martha, didn’t you? Sorry, go on.” She sat up properly and picked up her magazine, giving him his cue to continue.
Of course, Donna failed to keep up the pretence for too long, and peered over the top of her magazine. “Did she really fall for that silly smirk thing you do?”
“What smirk?” he protested.
“Gotta say, that girlie voice doesn’t do it for me, either.”
“Why do you think I’m trying to seduce you?”
“Because it’s what you do, isn’t it? Seduce women, I mean. Oh, don’t look at me like that; I’m not stupid, Spaceman. Actually, I’m quite flattered. Especially if you class me in the same league as Martha, ‘cos she’s... she’s ... Well, that white coat doesn’t do her any favours, but yeah...”
“Yeah, what?”
“Are you blind as well as stupid? You spent how long with this woman and you didn’t once notice how incredible her arse is?”
“No.” Technically that wasn’t a lie; he had noticed more than once. But going on about how great his previous companion was to the current one wasn’t the greatest of ideas. Well, he knew that now, anyway. “Why are you so dead against the idea of me seducing you?”
“Ha! I knew it.”
“I mean, you’re here now and everything. Seems silly not to.”
“You’re incredible, and I don't mean that in the good way.”
“I’m quite good at it, actually. Or so I’m told, anyway.”
“I’M. NOT. MATING. WITH. YOU. You got that?”
“Who said anything about mating? Casual sex, Donna,” he waggled his eyebrows at her – quite possibly his last throw of the dice. “All the cool kids are doing it.”
“I’m not a kid, Doctor.”
“Exactly! That’s the best bit. No strings attached, just sex. And we’re both mature enough to deal with it. Great, isn’t it?” The only problem was that the Doctor was now bouncing around Donna’s bedroom with a silly grin on his face that made him seem anything but mature. He noted this and hopped on to the end of Donna’s bed, posing (he hoped) rather seductively.
“This is ridiculous. You’re ridiculous.”
“I’ll let you go on top,” he murmured.
Precisely two minutes later...
Both naked now, the Doctor flipped Donna over on to her back. “Hey,” Donna stopped him, “you said I can go on top.”
“Did I?”
“Yes.” She slapped him, and not exactly playfully, either.
The Doctor’s face reddened, and not just where she slapped him. “Err, yeah... Donna, you might not want to do that again if you want me to last much longer,” he gasped.
’You’ve gotta be kidding me,’ thought Donna.
“Doctor?”
“Oh, Donna.” The Doctor ignored the questioning tone in Donna’s voice and continued with his efforts.
“No. Doctor?” she asked again.
“Oh, Donna.”
“Oi! Would you bloody well listen to me?” The seriousness of her voice was hidden by the rather loud pleasurable gasp she let out at the end of that sentence. The Doctor was right; he was rather good at this.
“What is it?” he asked, somewhat frustrated.
“The TARDIS. It’s... it’s... it’s... It’s changed colour.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Are you paying attention to anything I’m saying?”
The Doctor stopped moving for a moment and looked straight at her. “Do you seriously want me to stop?” And then, somewhat arrogantly, he thrust in to her at a quite perfect angle.
“Oh God, no.”
So he continued. Not for much longer, admittedly, but long enough for the TARDIS to complete the necessary calculations just in time for, well, in time for the inevitable.
“OK,” Donna breathed, “I’ll give you that one; you are quite good at that.”
It sounded like the Doctor replied, “Thank you”, but Donna couldn’t be sure as his voice was muffled by her breasts. She let the Doctor lie there for a little longer as he recovered. It was only fair; after all, he had two hearts to slow down instead of one.
But as she lay there, she realised that the ceiling of her bedroom had now completely changed colour. In fact, so had the rest of the walls, and the light looked different in the corridor outside as well.
“Doctor?”
He lifted his head. “Could you give me a minute? Blimey...”
“No, look. I was right, the TARDIS has changed colour.”
“But... But that’s...”
“Impossible?” Donna offered.
“No, not impossible. Just - ”
“Not good?”
“No, no,” the Doctor lied. “Just, you know, a bit odd.” He climbed off the bed and gathered up his clothes, backing slowly towards the door. “I’d better go and - ”
“Yeah.”
“Just... Don’t move, all right?” he said as he vanished through the door way, pulling his pants on in the process.
“Yeah, Doctor,” she yawned, “whatever you say.”
She was asleep within seconds.
He was half dressed by the time he reached the console room. Well, half decent, anyway.
“What have you done?” he asked his ship as he flicked the monitor on and typed in some complex equations on the console.
“Oh.” He stopped typing as the answer he sought appeared on the screen. “You - ” The lights in the console room flickered in response. “You - ” he stammered again.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“Donna, we need to have a little chat.”
“You said this wasn’t going to be weird.”
“Weird? Trust me, weird doesn’t even cover it.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Look, come here, there’s something I want to show you.”
“Don’t be so disgusting. Besides, I saw enough last night, thank you very much.”
“What? No, not that. Anyway, it’s not disgusting, is it? Of course, we’re not here to discuss the attractiveness of my genitalia,” he assured her. “Donna, there’s not really a good way for me to tell you this so I’m just going to have to say it. Donna, we’re pregnant.”
“I’m pregnant?”
“No.”
“What? But you just said - ”
“Yes, I thought it might soften the blow.”
“What blow?”
“I’m pregnant.”
“That’s...”
“Yep.”
“That’s...”
“I know.”
“That’s hilarious!” Donna blurted out. “Your ship knocked you up.” The fact that Donna was pointing and laughing wasn’t really helping matters.
“No, you knocked me up.”
“That’s what all that nonsense was with the lights and stuff, wasn’t it?”
“You were there too, I seem to remember.”
“What do you mean, ‘I seem to remember’? It should have been pretty bloody memorable for you.”
The Doctor sighed, “I think you’re missing the point.”
“So, you’re going to be a mum?”
“Dad. I’m going to be a dad.”
“Is that normal, though? For your lot, I mean; men having babies.”
“You don’t wanna know what was normal for my lot when it came to having babies.”
“What?”
“No, Donna. It’s not normal.”
“Well, what are you gonna do?”
“We, Donna. What are we gonna do,” he corrected.
“I mean, you’re not exactly in your prime, are you? I mean, you’re gonna need check ups and stuff like that.”
“Bit late for that.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, according to the scan the TARDIS performed earlier, I’m due in approximately four hours.”
“But... But you’re still so...” She gestured with her hands to emphasize how small his waist was.
“It’s the pinstripes; they’re very flattering.”
“I’ll make a note of that.”
“Not really the time for fashion tips, is it? I’m having your baby, Donna Noble.”
“Fucking hell.”
“That’s another thing: I don’t want you swearing around the baby.”
“Yeah but, fucking hell.”
He couldn't help but agree with her. “Tell me about it.”
“Well, I should get you to a hospital or something, shouldn’t I? Shouldn’t I?”
“That’s the problem: I can’t think of many hospitals that would be able to deal with a pregnant Time Lord in labour. Well, there was one, but it closed down. And, no, before you ask; I had nothing to do with it.”
“Well, what then? You don’t expect me to fetch some towels and hot water and just sit it out, do you?”
“Well, there was one person I thought might be able to help us.” And with that, he chucked her the mobile phone that lived permanently on the console.
“Martha? It’s Donna here.”
“Oh, hi, Donna. Is everything all right?”
She looked over at the Doctor who was just recovering from another contraction. “Err, yeah. Everything’s fine.”
“Argh, not again,” the Doctor yelled out in the background. He was now bent over the console, trying to control his breathing as another contraction took hold of him.
“Was that the Doctor? Is he all right?”
“Actually, Martha, I’ve got some news,” Donna admitted.
“What is it?”
“I’m going to be a dad.”
“You have got to be kidding me.”
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Date: 2008-04-27 07:14 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-04-27 08:09 pm (UTC)